I don't have working mom guilt. I choose to work and that is the best decision for my family. A couple months ago, I attended a taping of a Dr. Phil show on the subject. As he so lovingly put up on the graphics, it was really "Stay at Home vs. Working Moms" with Jessica Gottlieb representing the stay-at-home moms with the opinion that if you can't stay home with your children, you shouldn't have them.
Romi Lassally summed it up nicely on Huffington Post:
Basically, Jessica equates the hiring of a babysitter, or use of a daycare facility for the kids with the hiring of a surrogate (a hooker perhaps?) for the husband. While this is an interesting concept...it's just dead wrong. Working, or staying home full time is [sic] not be the litmus test by which we evaluate the quality of love a mother has for her kids. There are plenty of full time moms who aren't that loving and probably just as many working moms who love with a vengeance.
I responded to Jessica's post about her appearance:
I was in that audience on the Working Moms side. I choose to work and I don’t feel guilty about it. I don’t miss my children’s milestones. If my daughter giggles for the first time at daycare, she is also going to do it for me later, when I get home from work. Our wonderful daycare provider is not raising my children for me, she is simply caring for them for part of their day. They thrive under her expert care in ways I doubt they would at home with me all day. They are appropriately bonded and attached to me and their father. And I am certainly a much happier person for being able to use my talents on daily basis in a way that makes us a lot of money that gives us opportunities we wouldn’t otherwise have.
One thing that I posted about when Sarah Palin first appeared and was getting so much heat for her choices about work and family, is that some women CAN do it all. Some women are more capable than others when it comes to balancing their lives. Some women can simply do more than others can.
One thing you asked during the show was something like, “You wouldn’t outsource making love to your husband, so why would you outsource mothering your children?” I laughed when you said that because, honestly, if I could get a girl in to take care of the blowjobs, I would.
She responded to me thusly:
Not “making love to your husband”, just “loving him”.
I’m sorry you don’t enjoy marriage or parenthood.
I showed surprising restraint in my follow-up response. You can read the rest on her site. Also, please note that my husband is holding auditions this weekend for the blowjob girl.
