Opinions for Nothing

Live Blogging American Idol: Top 9 Sing

During the boring blah blah opening, Kris Allen looked really pissed. Everyone else looked really cheesy.

I guess Paula never watches the show because she'd surely notice that strapless tops enhance her armpit chub in a very unflattering way.

Anoop's up first singing a song by Usher. He looks good tonight, more like a real singer and less like a college student. I don't think this song is great, though. He's doing fine, but he seems more involved in his lame moves than the song. I don't even really know what the song was about. Husband thought it was good. Randy said he picked up the swagger and the vocals were good but it wasn't the right kind of song for him since it was a dancer's song. Kara said he played it safe and that it seemed like a bunch of frat guys dared him to get up and sing Usher. Paula said the vocals were good but to work on the stage presence. Simon thought it was a mess and came across as a wannabe college boy trying to be a pop star.

Megan is singing Lauryn Hill's version of Bob Marley's "Turn Your Lights Down Low." She said she felt punched in the mouth by the judges last week. I think she is wearing those high-waisted pants that made Jessica Simpson look terrible a few weeks back. I think this is finally a good song choice for her again. Seriously, her outfit is terrible. Kara likes Megan but thinks she's in trouble and thinks it is not the song choice for her and that she should have chosen Adele's "Chasing Pavement." Paula thinks Megan needs to take them by surprise with a sensitive, vulnerable ballad that rips out your heart. Simon says the song was boring, indulgent, and monotonous. Randy agrees with the boring part and says you can love a song, but that doesn't mean you're going to sing it well.

Danny is singing "What Hurts the Most" by Rascal Flatts. I think this is the most that I have heard him talk at once and I am finding him annoying. This is a really good song for him and he is singing it nicely. Paula's standing at the ready for humping and baby making. She gushes. Simon thought it was his best performance and compares the first two performances to "two snails competing with a race horse." Randy says, "Tonight's show starts right here." Kara says he moved everyone emotionally and connected with the audience.

Allison is singing "Don't Speak" by No Doubt and playing the guitar. I thought the beginning was really nice and different for her, then the pace picked up, she stopped playing the guitar, and it sounded like every other song she has ever sung on this show. Yawn. Randy says you can sing and blah blah blah, "But, dude, what are you wearing?" Kara thought it was a good performance but not her best. Paula calls the guitar her "axe" like she has some sort of edge. Simon brings up the outfit again and says it was like a precocious daughter trying to dress like a rock star and she lost her identity a bit, plus she shouted the song.

Scott MacIntyre is singing "Just the Way You Are" by Billy Joel. His hair is straight out of Grease, the Musical. The singing is definitely better this week and he didn't do his regular Bruce Hornsby arrangement. I'm guessing he'll still be around next week. It was better than Anoop's and Megan's performances. Kara said he made very smart decisions tonight with song choice and stripping it down. Ew, Kara LOVES the new look. Paula is proud of him and he made her forget he's blind. Simon says it was his best performance by a country mile and that is a totally different Scott. Simon says, "You got the Ryan Seacrest hair..." Randy adds, "...of yesteryear." Randy says it was one of the best performances of the night.

Matt is singing "You Found Me" by The Fray. He said that last week he chose a song he thought the judges would like (they did, but voters didn't) and this week he chose a song for him. He is playing a keyboard in an audience scrum. They clearly know the song and are singing along. I don't think this performance is as good as last week's was. Paula says he aborted the things they love most about him and it was a "sound alike." Simon says he should be happy because the judges DON'T like him this week (meaning voters will, I guess) and that he sounded uptight and it was uncomfortable. Randy says it was the wrong song, maybe One Republic would have been better than The Fray - Simon and Kara immediately agree. Kara says he is talented and doesn't deserve to go home.

Lil is singing Celine Dion's "I Surrender." She said she really had trouble picking a song this week because she has been getting nailed by the judges over song choice. Husband thinks it will be good as long as she nails it. Why don't the stylists give these girls Spanx? Sounded great to me. Randy says it would not have been his song choice because he wants her to have more swagger, but that she sang it really well and that she should "young it up" a bit. Kara was surprised by her effortless range and that we got a glimpse of what we saw in the beginning and we need to see more of it. Paula doesn't want to see an adult contemporary Lil Rounds. Simon says ditto and it was safe and similar to a wedding performance because the song was too soft. They all want her to sing Mary J Blige, as they have been saying for WEEKS. Why the f didn't she finally choose a Mary J song? Lil is crying but I think it is not because of what the judges were saying but because Ryan went into the audience and asked her kids how they felt about the judges being tough on her. Cheap tactics.

Oh, yay, I can dowload all these "great" performances on iTunes.

Adam is singing Wild Cherry's "Play That Funky Music" with a more contemporary arrangement. I have my doubts. He kept the Elvis hair from last week. I miss the Johnny Rzeznik hair. This arrangement messes up the best part of the song. I think Simon is going to say this was an indulgent mess and screachy. I will not disagree if he does. I lost a little of my Adam love tonight. Paula clearly did not. She says something about true genius and compares him to Mick Jagger and Steven Tyler. Simon says it was brave and it was original but it won't make him as popular as last week. Randy says he was in the star zone. Adam gives props to the band for the arrangement. Kara says she can't wait to see him each week and says, "It was very Studio 57 up in here." Then we very clearly see Simon mouthing "Studio 54... 54" to her.

Kris Allen is singing "Ain't No Sunshine," which is one of my favorite songs - I have three versions of it on my iPod. There is too much musical accompaniment. It is a more contemporary version, but it isn't better. Fortunately for him, no one agrees with me. Randy says he is so in the zone and it was one of the best performances tonight, so creative and cool. Kara says, "That is artistry! Woo!" Paula says it was his best performance to date. Simon says he brought the confidence and that it was a clever arrangement.

Why does American Idol end at 9:25 tonight? I don't get it. I'm not complaining, though.

Bottom three prediction: Anoop and Megan for sure. Allison or Scott or Matt for third (probably Matt).

Toddler Bedding Update

Thanks again for all your opinions about what type of bedding I should get for Kenna's new room. I did finally find a garden-themed bedding set that I like. It was really difficult! All the ones I was seeing were just so pastel or so bright. They would have looked really cute with the white furniture I was planning on getting, but they weren't really my style.

Then, to throw another wrench into the works, a friend gave us her old crib and changing table. We are, of course, very grateful for it, but the coloring made finding bedding even more difficult. The set has a natural stain (like light oak), but the top rail on each of the two crib ends is a dark country blue. (This crib is in astounding condition after having gone through three boys.)

Last week, I got a JC Penney baby catalog in the mail and found this perfect garden bedding set. The colors are darker than I had been seeing in other sets, so the blue on the crib will go nicely. It was lots cheaper than the one from Pottery Barn I had been considering, especially since my mom had a 15% off coupon.

Now we just need to get the new crib out of the living room and up into Kenna's new room.

Note: We only got the 4-pc bedding set, not every matchy, matchy thing in the picture.

American Idol: Top 10 Results

This is a recap instead of a live blog because the President decided his primetime press conference was more important than American Idol showing on its regular night, and because I have a class on Thursday nights. Tonight, in my MBA class, a student could not pronounce the word "incompetent."

I'm really looks forward to the Smokey Robinson and Joss Stone duet, but I may FF through the rest of the crap to get to the results. Maybe we'll move to the east coast so we can actually watch things live instead "recorded during an earlier telecast."

Last night they got the most votes ever received for a Top 10 in the history of American Idol.

Randy is still wearing the necklace I made at camp. The rest of the judges are there, too. Ryan asks what the hell was up with Paula and Simon last night. Ryan said get a room. Simon said they did. I told you they were having secret sex! You read it here first.

Blech. Group sing. At least these Motown songs work pretty well with multiple singers. FF through that and the really lame Ford "music video" commercial.

Reuben Studdard is singing some song. He is sweating so much I wonder if he will be blind by the end of the song. Seriously, he never sweat this much during his competition shows and he was a lot fatter then. He's married now.

Allison is wearing six-inch platform hooker shoes.

Adam is safe. Duh. Matt Giraud is in the bottom three. Ridiculous! Voters, you suck. Also, maybe I should start voting. Kris is safe but Ryan tricks him into thinking he is in the bottom three.

Michael Sarver and Lil Rounds stand up together. Lil is safe. Michael is rightly in the bottom three. So that means that either Scott MacIntyre or Megan Corkrey is NOT in the bottom three tonight, which is just an insult to Matt Giraud.

Smokey and Joss are singing "You're the One for Me." It is, of course, perfection.

Allison is safe, as is Anoop. I love Anoop's parents. They always look so sweet. Danny is safe. Ryan's "they do not agree" shtick is getting old. Scott and Megan stand together, and Scott finally gets sent to the bottom three.

Two out of three deserve to be there. If Matt Giraud is voted off tonight, I think the judges will save him. Scott is the one who finds out first that he's safe. Seriously, it better be Michael Sarver who is voted off.

Stevie Wonder is singing a Motown medley before we get to find out. I do love Stevie Wonder, but I am about to FF. Ok, right after Ma Cherie Amour, which is my favorite Stevie song.

I think Matt is trying to look stoic, but he looks sad and/or pissed. No worries, though, Michael is the one with the lowest number of votes. No way his performance will be good enough to make the judges use their save. So, I am not even going to torture myself with it. FF!

He gets a consolation standing ovation air hump from Paula. Ok, I ended the FF a little early. I think this performance is actually worse than last night's. He knows he's going home.

The judges seriously can't decide? You have to be kidding me. Kara says it was really good tonight. Simon says they have to make a decision and he is going home and then my DVR cuts off. Fucking American Idol needs to learn how to end the fucking show on time!

Live Blogging American Idol: Top 10 Sing

I'm starting a few minutes late tonight because we were watching The Mentalist from last night. I'm pretty sure I didn't miss anything. I can't wait until it gets down to one hour a night.

It's Motown night. The judges are dawdling, speaking to audience members. Smokey Robinson and Barry Gordy. Ugh, Paula's armpit chub is in attendance tonight.

FF through the history of Motown. Smokey Robinson proves that black don't crack. Dude is like 100 and he looks 50. He's written over 4000 songs.

Matt Giraud is singing "Let's Get It On." Smokey says Matt "did more than justice" to Marvin Gaye's music. The singing is excellent and I totally believe that Matt wants to get it on with me, but I'm not cheating on my husband with some dude wearing a cardigan and a tie. Husband said this is the best Matt's done so far. Randy is wearing some jewelry I made in camp in sixth grade. All the judges thought it was great; song choice and singing.

Kris Allen is singing "How Sweet It Is" by Marvin Gaye. Kris is really young. I noticed for the first time that he is 23. Smokey loves his performance. Kris is wearing some weird army shirt. This definitely seems like his own version of the song, which is not necessarily the best thing. I am not getting the same warm fuzzies I usually get when I hear this song. His performance is good, it's just missing something for me. Kara says it is about artistry at this point and he did everything right on this performance. Paula says he picked a great song. Simon says it was smart that he did his own version, but he needs to get some swagger. Randy says he hit the zone.

Scott MacIntyre is wearing pink pants. That's just cruel. Seriously, who the fuck dressed the blind guy in pink pants? Still, I'm over him. He's singing "You Can't Hurry Love" by Diana Ross. Based on his practice with Smokey, I think it's going to blow. Smokey thinks Scott has made the song contemporary. I was right; it blows. It's another Scott-MacIntrye-covering-Bruce-Hornsby-covering-the-original-artist version of a song. Paula says it didn't matter that he was at the piano because having the singers stand right there made all the difference. Whatever. Simon asks how much more can I take? Not much. He thought it was completely the wrong song choice and a bit cheap. Simon rightly says Scott is not connecting emotionally. Randy says it was a hotel performance. Kara liked the tempo but didn't like the liberties he took with the melody.

Paula tries a gag wherein she implies Simon is immature by giving him crayons and a coloring book. Scott says you have to vote for the pink pants and then apologizes for the pink pants saying they only told him they were pink ten minutes before the show started. Rude!

Megan Corkrey is singing "For Once In My Life." Smokey says she is half jazz, half caberet. "You're so different, I like that." I think Paula and Simon have secret sex. This performance is very Love Boat. The hair, the dress, the song arrangement, the dancing. Blech. Bottom three tomorrow night. Randy says the song was a train wreck. "Rushed and hectic, mad and crazy." Kara says she should have sang "My Guy" and she hit bad notes all over the place, etc. Paula falls back on complimenting looks before delivering the same criticism as the other two. Simon says she looks good but it was horrible. Simon calls out the arrangement, and that makes me wonder how much control the contestants have over the arrangement, or if it is foisted on them.

Peeve: I hate when the contestants say "I had fun" as a counter to the criticism from the judges. It doesn't matter how much fun you had delivering a shitty performance in a singing competition.

Anoop Desai is singing "Ooh, Baby, Baby," which is a Smokey song. Based on the practice, I think I will be having sex with Anoop later. Smokey says Anoop blew him away. He's doing the "intimate" sit down on the edge of the stage thing. I take it back; we won't be humping. The singing is good but I feel like Anoop is thinking more about the next note he has to it than he is about me (or the girl in the song). Kara says it is a very difficult song and he did a pretty good job, missed some falsettos, but showed that he can really sing. Paula says it is spot on and sweet and tender. Simon said it was a great vocal but that Anoop looked half asleep, that there is a difference between serious and boring, and he needs to work on showmanship. Randy says he needs to turn it up next week, while keeping the great vocals.

Michael Sarver didn't get to go to Detroit with the rest of them because he had the flu. Smokey came out to the L.A. house, though. Michael is singing "Heard It Through the Grapevine" and Michael says he is going to church it up. Smokey tells him it was a little weak and he needs to pound it a little more. Michael is clearly unable to deliver. Husband says bottom three for sure. It isn't terrible and it is definitely better than Scott's performance, but that's where my niceties end. Um, the last bit actually was terrible. Paula looks like she wants to cry because she has to deliver criticism. She says it was kind of Vegas loungey. Simon couldn't wait for it to end because Michael was screaming and shouting the song and he has no chance of winning. Michael is very humble and sincere in his response to Simon's critique. Randy says he made it corny. Kara brings up the artistry thing again and says he needs to let them know who he is as an artist, which he didn't do this week. Michael tells Ryan he's just happy to be in the top ten. He should be, because he doesn't deserve it.

Lil Rounds is singing "Heat Wave." Smokey says she could sing the phonebook. I'm so sick of hearing that phrase. She's wearing a wig or extensions or something that gives her a retro look, which is nice. The singing is, of course, great. Paula is standing. I wonder is she knows Lil is a girl; she usually reserves that for the boys. Randy says the front of the song was a little bit torture for him and that it wasn't the right kind of song for her and he felt she was rushing through it since it was up-tempo and there were so many words; her big voice needs room. Kara doesn't think it was the right song. Paula disagrees with all their sound advice. Simon says it was an authentic tribute to Motown but he wouldn't have chosen that song for her because it didn't give her "a moment." 

Adam Lambert is singing "The Tracks of My Tears" by Smokey Robinson. Smokey said he's never heard it done like that and was proud of Adam. Smokey also said the song is literal. He wondered what it would be like if someone cried so much his tears literally left tracks on his face. Adam is very Chris Isaak tonight. He's wearing a suit and has Elvis hair, with a small acoustic band joining his onstage. Singing is superb and guess who wants to hump him. Me. I'm pretty sure he wants to hump me, too. Smokey has tears in his eyes and gives Adam a standing ovation. Kara says it's one of the best performances of the night and he showed artistry. Paula says his instincts are right on in being able to bring an element of surprise. Simon says it was THE best performance of the night and that Adam sums up everything they were telling everyone else and that he has emerged as a star. Randy says he showed his range and versatility.

I want to watch it again. So we will, instead of watching commercials. Adam did with this song what Lil should have done with "Heat Wave" because that could be such a sexy slow song. If Adam gets voted out before the top five, the judges will save him, no question. Also, seeing his performance makes me think they have a lot of control over the arrangement, so no excuse for Megan.

Danny Gokey is singing "Get Ready." I really love Smokey Robinson. Ok, so Danny totally did not take Smokey's very good advice about changing something and he totally should have. What the fuck? You don't take advice from SMOKEY ROBINSON about singing a Motown song? You're a tool. That alone has prejudiced me against liking this. Paula says he is undeniable, identifiable, and reliable (?) or something else that rhymes. Simon says it was clumsy and amateurish. Randy loved the energy. Kara thought it was good not great. They rushed the critiques because they're out of time. No mention of his dis of Smokey.

Allison Iraheta is singing "Papa Is a Rolling Stone" and is, thank goodness, the last performer of the night. Uh, oh, they're calling attention to how she didn't know the words in practice. Maybe she didn't know them in rehearsal either. She looks old and a little dumpy tonight. This is not great. She's a good singer, but who cares? I don't. I'm so bored by this. Both Kara and Paula are standing up, along with Smokey and the entire audience. Everyone disagrees with me. Randy says she is blazing hot. Kara says she is amazing and doesn't understand why she was in the bottom three last week. Maybe because people like me are totally bored. Paula has a magic marker moustache courtesy of Simon. He says is was one of her best performances.

Bottom three prediction: Scott MacIntrye, Megan Corkrey, Michael Sarver

I won't be able to live blog the results show tomorrow thanks to the President's primetime news conference last night. I have a class on Thursday nights. I will blog it when I get home from class, though. I don't think anyone reads this while I'm doing it anyway.

Top two prediction: Adam and Allison

Live Blogging American Idol: Top 11 Sing

Ryan Seacrest was on Oprah this week and said he knows who is going home before the show starts and when he walks down the line of contestants at the beginning of the show that he is careful to look at each of them the same way because he feels like they are scrutinizing him for clues. Same thing when he is calling their names and making them sweat it out.

Randy and Kara both seem normal tonight. Paula does not look crazy. Her boobs still look puffier, but the weird cavern cleavage is back. Simon is wearing a light-colored tee for a change.

Oh, how sweet. Lil Rounds is going to the prom after this. So is Megan, but it looks like her prom is in 1969.

Some sort of boring piece on the Grand Ole Opry gives me time to take chocolate break, with caffeine-free Diet Pepsi accompaniment. Ah, Randy Travis is the mentor this week.

Michael Sarver is up first, singing "Ain't Going Down 'Til the Sun Comes Up" by Garth Brooks. Randy tells him to be careful. Why, oh why, would you change up the melody on a song like this. Michael doesn't have the lungs for this. He can't breathe. This really sucks. He isn't even doing well on the singy parts. He did what Randy warned him against; he lost the words because it's so fast. The harmonica player rocked it, though. Randy says it was a cool song choice because it showed a different side, but didn't show his vocal capabilities. Kara is impressed he could remember all the words, but missed the singing. Michael says something dumb about country music is about having fun. Paula liked seeing him having fun and like the harmonica player and says the genre suits him well. Simon says it should have gone well because he thought the genre would suit Michael well, but says he couldn't understand a single word. Simon says he came across as likable karaoke singer, but not a star. Michael dicks out and says, "If we were all perfect, we wouldn't need this show." With Ryan's prompting, Simon gives Michael a 1.2 out of 10.

Crap. I was going to try to be briefer this week.

Alison is up now. Randy Travis is impressed with the maturity of her voice. She does a dumb little dance and Randy tells her not to try to be too cute. She is singing "Blame It On Your Heart." She's doing well. I think this is a good song choice because it forces a little variation into her performance. Otherwise, I really think every single thing she sang would sound the same. The judges are about to jizz all over her. Kara says she could sing the alphabet and made the song her own. Paula says it's another rock solid performance and says she will go far in the business if she starts showing other sides of her vocals, and show some vulnerability. Wow, for once I agree with Paula. Simon thought it was good but a little tuneless in parts like she was trying to remember the words. Randy disagrees with Simon's assessment that it was verging on precocious and says it was dope.

Kris Allen is up and singing "To Make You Feel My Love" by Garth Brooks. Randy says Kris is a strong ballad singer and thinks Kris will do well and made it his own instead of copying Garth's version. He is singing sans guitar tonight and is sitting on a stool. His singing is definitely better this week and he seems to really mean all the words he's singing (one of the judges is guaranteed to say something about an emotional connection.) Husband says, "Singing was better, but BORING!" Paula is pleasantly surprised and says it was an honest, pure, and something performance. Simon thought it was terrific and a very smart song choice and thinks, for the first time, that Kris has a shot at winning. Randy says, "Wow, tender moments from my dog, Kris... a tender dog." Kara says it was just beautiful and she didn't even know it was country.

Why does Lil get the pre-performance sit-down chat with Ryan when no one else did? She is singing "Independence Day" by Martina McBride. Ooh, steel guitar. This is boring. Her version loses its impact. She is smiling through a song that is about escaping abuse. It was like Anoop's cheesy version of "Beat It." Randy says it wasn't comfortable on her and it was just alright. Kara says she is a great singer, we know that, but that blah, blah, blah, useless critique. Paula has mostly positive things to stay but says she should have got to the chorus after one verse (read: it was boring). Simon calls her "Little" instead of "Lil" and gets all kinds of shit for it. He says it looked like she is a girl who can sing and was forced to sing a song at a wedding that someone else chose for her and was uncomfortable. He was trying to give her a good critique about following in the footsteps of other R&B singers who have taken John Michael Montgomery songs and made them their own, but Lil started babbling and he had to tell her to shut it.

Adam Lambert, my luvah, is up next. He is doing some Middle Eastern version of "Ring of Fire." Randy is speechless, he is so weirded out. Randy comments on the nail polish Adam is wearing. A touch of the homophobia, or metrosexualophobia? Husband comments on Adam's bad skin. This is better than last week, but I can see how Randy, a country boy, was totally weirded out by Adam and this version of the song. It was a perfect version for Adam, though. Kara thought it was strange and doesn't know what to make of it. She says, "Strange," about a dozen times. Paula speaks. Simon says, "I think what Randy [Travis] was trying to say was, 'What the hell was that?'" Simon thinks it was indulgent rubbish and horrific. Randy [Jackson] says it was like Nine Inch Nails doing a country song, current and fresh. I don't think NIN is current or fresh, though I do like them.

Scott McIntyre is singing "Wild Angels" by Martina McBride. Randy says he didn't tell Scott that he thought it was a bad song choice at first. He gave some advice to Scott about the tempo. Scott is, of course, playing the piano and singing. Ok, this time he really sounds like the guy who sings solos each week at church. He's really good, for church. This is totally the Christian Lite version of this song, right down to his angelic halo of curls. Paula says it was another impressive, lovely performance, but feels like the piano is a bit of a crutch that separates him from the audience. Simon says that was stupid of Paula to say about the piano and remarks that Elton John used to sit behind the piano. Paula won't shut up and keeps arguing. Simon says that he hasn't really liked the song choices. Scott says he has lost a lot of hat picks for song choice the last two weeks. Randy says it was nice and good but he is looking for the stand-out vocals. Kara says that everyone is saying he needs to up his game and go for it.

Alexis Grace is singing "Jolene" by Dolly Parton. She also gets the sit-down chat with Ryan. She's kind of boring. Randy thinks Alexis did a great job with the song and telling the story. She does a really good job with it. I expect unanimous positive critiques. Nope, I was wrong. Randy says she didn't hit all the notes and had some pitch problems everywhere. Kara says she lost her edge a bit and it was disappointing. Paula thought it was effective and she enjoyed the vulnerable, soft side. Simon thought it was ok but was a little bit "sound alike" and forgettable.

Danny Gokey is wearing a truly hideous jacket. Search out a picture of it tomorrow. Danny was nervous in front of Randy and couldn't even get started. Randy makes a nice comment about his soulfulness. He is singing "Jesus Take the Wheel" by Carrie Underwood. This is my least favorite performance of his. Husband says, "Pitchy." I say, "Boring." That seems to be a common theme for tonight and that isn't a commentary on country music, which I actually like. The audience LOVED it so much that Kara can barely get started. She says the first half was not spectacular, but that he came out in the second half and really connected with the powerful notes. Paula is really hard to recap because she is mostly incoherent and irrelevant. Simon agrees with something Paula said about building the story. Simon hates what Danny is wearing and says that it looks like he is going on a polar expedition. Danny says Matt Giraud told him he looks like he is about to jump out of a plane. Randy mentions the pitchy thing.

Anoop Desai is singing "You Are Always on My Mind" by Willie Nelson. Randy thought he was good and thinks it will be the best anyone has heard from Anoop. I agree with Randy. At this point in the show, I am having American Idol fatigue. Two hours is brutal. Paula says Anoop is back and liked the song choice and makes a lame reference to Michael Jackson's glove. Simon says Anoop went from zero to hero and says it was one of his favorite performances of the whole night and takes back what he said last week about Anoop not deserving to be on the show. Randy says this is the reason they brought Anoop back into the competition with the wild card. Kara says he was amazing.

Megan Joy Corkrey is singing "I Go Walking After Midnight." Randy thinks the song has already been done every different way, but is impressed that she managed to have a unique version. Her boobs look ginormous. Her weird dancing is less obvious under her giant ugly dress. I think she missed it on a few of the notes, but what do I know about that? Randy thought it was going to be a train wreck but was quite impressed and thought it was the perfect choice. Kara says, "Perfect song, perfect look," and says Megan had the flu. Paula says Megan had to go to the hospital. I guess that explains the coughing. Simon says she should have the flu every week. Ha! He also says she looks a little bit like she's going to the prom tonight.

Matt Giraud is last. Thank goodness this is almost over. I might have to skip tomorrow night's results show because I have to prepare for a debate in my Business Ethics class on Thursday. Matt is singing "So Small" by Carrie Underwood. Randy thinks he did a great job and surprised him with the version of the song. Paula is weirdly stroking Simon's arm. She's a damn freak. Matt is playing piano and singing. I've never heard this song, but I think it sounds good and Matt is doing a good job. I don't think he has what it takes to win. It kind of seems like this is the limit of what he can do and it isn't as good as some of the others in this competition. Paula is standing, so I think she'll disagree with me, or she will at least provide Matt with a consolation hump after he gets booted. Kara says, "There ain't nothin' small about you." What? She thought it was amazing. Paula thought is was authentic, but she has trouble getting the word out. She is tearing up. Simon says Matt hasn't gotten enough credit for his vocals in this competition so far and thinks Matt outsang Danny tonight. Randy says this was his favorite performance of the night.

I'm spent.

The AIG Bonus "Scandal"

Getting mad at AIG is like getting mad at your small child for eating the entire candy bar your father-in-law gave her. Maybe you should focus your outrage on the person who gave your kid the candy bar with no instruction about how to consume it.

AIG asked for money. The government gave AIG money. AIG is spending the money. That's pretty much all there is to the story. If you're pissed about how AIG is spending the money, you should be pissed at the government for not putting any restrictions on AIG when the government handed over the money.

American Idol: Top 13 Results Show

The new rule: Judges get to use a 'save' one time in the competition and it has to be unanimous. The night they use the save, no one gets eliminated, but the next week, two people get eliminated.

Not quite the shake-up I was expecting.

The contestants are touring their mansion. Anoop crashes on a bed. Don't get comfortable, I think you're going home tonight. Basketball court, steam room, gorgeous pool, blah, blah, blah.

The horrific group sing medley is as bad as it ever was. The husband says these sound like Kidz Bop songs. I think they made Danny Gokey do a little solo dance just to remind us how terrible his dancing was last night.

The Vitamin Water commerical featuring Carrie Underwood as the miniature horse whisperer is funny. "She kind of makes a man want to be a miniature horse."

Recap filler from last night where we have to see clips of things we saw just 24 hours ago. Don't worry, AI, I haven't forgotten how crazy Paula looked. Tonight she looks less crazy, but her fleshy boobs looks like they've grown overnight. Her weird cavern cleavage seems to have transformed into a more normal boob crease.

Oh God, the music video. Ford. Worse than the group sing. Ford. Hey, did you know that Ford sponsors American Idol? Ford.

Michael Sarver, please stand up. Safe. Barf. I like him less each time I see him.

Alison, please stand up and give us no sense of suspense whatsoever because we know you're safe.

Jasmine... uh, oh... she has to join Ryan down at the center of the stage. Matt Giraud is asked to stand up and immediately starts heading down to the stage, but he gets to sit down because he is safe, too.

Kris is safe but Megan has to join Jasmine on the stage. One is going home and it is Jasmine. Megan "Caw Caw" Corkrey is safe.

Ryan makes a big deal about Jasmine going home UNLESS THE JUDGES SAVE HER. She has to sing again while the jugdes chat about her fate. Husband has a running commentary going, which contains things like, "Now she's pitchy," and, "Now flat." I am guessing the judges are going to hold onto the save. Just noticed the dead bird Jasmine is wearing on a chain around her neck.

I was right about the judges. Randy delivers the news that she is going home. Now Jasmine breaks into tears. Ryan whispers sweet nothings in her ear before we see Jasmine's adios montage.

So looking forward to the upcoming performance by Kanye West.

Oh, no! I saw a link during the commercial break about the new rule on Yahoo's home page, so I clicked on it and they had the names of both eliminated contestants right in the giant title of the article. Boo! I hate Yahoo! Also, no more web surfing during commercials.

Kanye West blows. His voice has some sort of computer effect on it to try to disguise his horrendous singing. His band is wearing some sort of futuristic riot gear. He's dancing on the judges tables, which is surrounded by fans. Judges, I am guessing, are in the green room listening to something else.

Scott and Alexis are safe. How many pairs of glasses does Danny Gokey own? Of course he's safe, too.

Anoop knows he has to join Ryan on the stage and starts heading there before Ryan says it. I can't even hear what Ryan is saying about my hump buddy, Adam Lambert, because girls are screaming so loud in the audience. Adam is safe, too.

Jorge and Lil Rounds both stand up. You know Ryan is going to tell her to sit down because she's safe and Jorge to join him on stage. And he does. Wow, shocking.

I wish I didn't already know which one is safe! I hate spoilers for this kind of show. I don't seem to mind them for sitcoms and dramas, though. Anyway, I have to wait until after the commercial break for Ryan to tell me what I already know.

Oh, and Kelly Clarkson has to sing first. Her hair looks like ass. She is singing "My Life Would Suck Without You." I am not loving it, but at least she can sing.

Anoop is safe. His mom is so happy in the audience. Jorge now has to sing it out while the judges deliberate and will still send him home.

Yep, Jorge's song is still awful. It would be better a capella. Simon gives a succinct "No" when Ryan asks if they judges will save him. Jorge is stoic while watching his montage.

And the show manages to end on time tonight. I'll be back on Tuesday, with a much shorter blog post than last night's.  That was just too much. I think it's the reason I was late for work this morning. I was exhausted!

American Idol: Oops, I Forgot I Am Live Blogging This

So, it's an hour in and I just started up American Idol on the DVR. I'll get this live blogging thing right next time.

It's a Michael Jackson kind of night and Lil Rounds is up first, singing "The Way You Make Me Feel." Her outfit is terrible and makes her normally bootylicious butt look like an uncomfortable appendage. Randy and Kara are in love with her. Paula looks all kinds of crazy tonight, like her outfit is the offspring of Bjork's goose dress from years ago, and she is wearing someone else's face. She loves Lil Rounds, too. I agree with Simon that she sang well but I wasn't blown away by it. Simon says it was a lazy song choice - the first part was better than the second part - and he hated what she was wearing.

Blind Scott has a family. They like to sing. His sister is blind, too. That is seriously how interesting his intro was. He is playing the piano and singing "Keep the Faith." It's not terrible, but it's about as interesting as that intro was. He is definitely doing better than when he stands up at the mic. Husband says he's not as pitchy. I, being tone deaf, know nothing about that. Kara asks if he just learned that song on piano this week and gives a shrug like, "Clearly." She likes him, though. Every time Paula says "your instrument," it creeps me out. Simon apologizes to the songwriter, who is in the audience, because he hates the song. He says, "It's fine to be artistic, just not on this show." Otherwise, he thinks Scott was good. Randy thinks he played it too safe.

Danny Gokey has a big family and he is hamming it up for them and the cameras. He is singing "PYT (Pretty Young Thing)." He tricked us into thinking it was the slow jam version, which I was seriously going to hate, but now he is rocking it and I have completely forgiven him for his hammy opening act. Ok, seriously, Paula looks like she is on the backside of a botox bender. She is babbling incoherently all over the place in her rush to get Danny to the finals. Simon says the vocals were brilliant, but that the dancing was hideous due to the over-excitement. Danny does not disagree about the dancing. I agree about the singing. I think Michael Jackson is supremely talented and I felt like this was a better version of the song than the original. Randy liked that Danny showed a different side. Kara says he should thank his parents for making him sing his homework. Guess I missed that reference in the intro.

Michael Sarver, who is lucky to even be in the top 13, grew up without a dad. Boo hoo. His mom has Sarah Palin's hair and Harry Potter's glasses. Michael is singing "You Are Not Alone." His voice seems thin, lacking in depth. Does that make sense? He is doing a lot better than he did in the last round, though. Simon states the obvious and says Michael isn't the best singer but he made up for it with passion and jokes, "I wish we knew what you did for a living," because most of that intro was devoted to the oil rig crap again. Randy says he is one of the best so far tonight. Out of four. Whatever. Kara says, oh, I guess you can sing. Paula has now taken on a rosy glow and spouts some nonsense about an artist coloring things up. Also, my dog just took a shit in the living room. I hate pets.

Jasmine did something with something called a Glam Squad, which involves shopping with a stylist. Whoopie! She has a close-knit, large family and the cutest nephew ever. They are all super nice and attractive. Her sister looks like a model. She is singing "I'll Be There." Her dress is cute, but she has visible pantylines. She needs Spanx. This seems like a really good song choice for her. The very last notes petered out a little. Randy name drops Mariah Carey and how he produced her version of the song. He was surprised and says it wasn't bad. Kara was also surprised and says she sold it. Also, something about singing it a half key down maybe. Paula says there were some moments when she was "under." Simon says he agrees mostly with the others and that it was a bit robotic and she needs to lighten up a little. I can't believe they were less complimentary to her than to Michael Sarver. Whatever.

Ryan's tie is stupid. Kris Allen is from Conway, Arkansas. Music is in his blood. He has a wife of five months, so there goes all the votes he got just because he looks kissable. Aw, Kris and Katy in matching aprons. He's singing "Remember the Time" and playing the guitar. I really like this song and he isn't messing it up, so that's a good start. Yeah, I still kind of want to hump him. He isn't nearly the singer some of the other top 13 are, but I could definitely see him as a singer-songwriter type of artist. Paula didn't stand up, so that's bad news since she stands up whenever she wants to hump. Kara says he does much better with a guitar but was off on a few notes. Says he spent a lot of time helping out the other contestants and gives him props for being a good guy. Paula can't even focus enough to get out a complete sentence. Says he was "engaging" and "kind of adorable sexy" and she loves him and wants to hump him. Her gosling dress is falling apart. Simon says that song didn't really suit the guitar and says he isn't sure he would have brought the wife out so early. Ha! Randy says he was kind of cool.

Alison's parents are Salvadorean. She started singing in a Latin shopping center at the age of five. It looks crazy, but they love her there. She has wanted to audition for American Idol since she was nine, which makes me want to weep about how old I am. She is singing "Give In to Me." I think. I listened twice and still am not sure about the title. It sounds just like the last couple of songs she sang. To be honest, now I am getting a little bored with her. If everything she sings is going to sound just like this, I don't think she'll last long. Paula is amazed by her age and says keep doing what she's doing because she's a rock star. Simon says it was a good performance and that at least we know who she is. Randy says she's got it and she was born with it. He thinks she'll be able to sing anything and I hope we'll see it. Kara tells her to keep being a rocker girl.

We missed the banter between Anoop and Ryan because we were busy guessing which song he will sing. Husband thinks "Thriller." His mom says he was spoiled as an only child. His parents are cute. They look like a nice, normal family. He is singing "Beat It." He is doing a good job, but this isn't a song that really showcases singing talent and vocal range. It was entertaining, though, and I sure like him better than Michael Sarver. Paula is arguing with Simon that it's his turn to go first, but he makes her go first. She thinks this song is untouchable and belongs to the consummate artist and anything else sounds like karaoke. Simon says it was lightweight with no agression and called it "stupid" and a "bad impersonation." Randy also invokes the karaoke comparison and says it was the wrong choice. Kara agrees with them and also agrees with me about the lack of range. Ryan asks Simon if he now regrets putting Anoop in the top 13 and Simon says yes.

After the break is Jorge and I think it was pretty rude of them to show him in the make-up chair.

Ryan's Nana and Mama are in the audience. So what?

Jorge has a big family. Cue the sad music; his family was torn apart by the death of his grandfather. Jorge is singing "Never Say Goodbye." The music and the background singers are very soft-hits-AM-radio and it is really distracting me from his singing, which actually sounds good. Seriously, this is cheeseball. Randy loves him but wouldn't have chosen this song for him. Kara didn't feel connected to him emotionally and also says this wasn't the right song. Paula says she loves him more than the others didn't like the song choice. Jorge says, "I wasn't going to sing 'Bad' by Michael Jackson." Simon says, "You kind of did." He also says it was corny and the arrangement was terrible.

Wow, this post is really long! I think I used to write shorter recaps. The thing I like about live blogging American Idol is that someone gets eliminated each week, which means shorter and shorter posts.

Megan says her friends and family made her audition and she has never performed on stage before American Idol. I guess that's pretty clear from her mic dancing. She is super cute. What? She has a baby, too? And she's divorced? OMG, her kid just kissed the cell phone when she was talking to him. Now I am a big hormonal mess. She is singing "Rockin' Robin." She's rocking it and actually walking around the stage this time. The dancing isn't much better than before, but she is really getting everyone going. Her quirkiness comes through a little less on this song, but she's still one of my faves. Oh, Jesus. She gave an extra little butt shake at the end and sang, "Caw! Caw!" Kara says Megan put her own stamp on it but hopes she sings something that shows more of her range. Paula says Megan didn't come through enough. Simon likes her but says it was a stupid song choice and the dancing was ridiculous. Randy says the song choice didn't allow her to be herself. Simon asks Gordon Ramsey's opinion. We can't hear him and Simon says, "Right, he doesn't know what he's talking about."

Adam Lambert moved to Hollywood from San Diego right after high school. His parents are supportive. He is singing "Black or White." Oh, I should mention I want to hump him. The first part of the song is sketchy. Paula is standing and the song still isn't going well yet, so you know she really wants to have his babies. He is definitely adding his own thing to this song, but I am not loving it. Paula waves her arms around and spews a little bit of the crazy before getting to the critique. She can't even speak. She eventually gets out that she is transfixed by him. She is making him tear up with her slobbery love fest. Simon says it was in a totally different league than everything else they heard tonight. Randy says he is the most current, the most right now, and could make a record that would go straight to the top of the charts. Kara agrees with everyone and hopes Michael Jackson is watching this tonight. OMG, Paula has armpit flab the size of a gerbil.

Matt Giraud lives near my husband's family in Michigan. His family vacations a lot. He thinks his dad is funny, but his dad is actually just being a big old crybaby on camera. Oh jeez, so is his mom. Ryan is in the audience in some sort of girly scrum. Matt is singing "Human Nature" and playing the piano. Much better than Scott was singing and playing. He is a little John Mayer-ish in parts. Paula is standing! So many candidates for the father of her child this season. Randy says it was good even with a couple pitchy parts. Kara says he is talented. Paula is blown away. Simon says it was very good, solid, "meat and potatoes."

Alexis grew up in Memphis with the blues. Her dad is a musician. She sounds terrible singing along to his guitar playing. She cries about her toddler, who it totally cute and gets her toddler to say "Seacrest out." She is singing "Dirty Diana" and wearing a weird shorty jumpsuit. The beginning of the song is very talky and not great. Really, it seems like she is barely singing this. Her dancing consists of some sort of jerky walk during the chorus. Meh. WHAT?! Kara says, "You're back!" and "You're a naughty girl and I liked it." Paula loved it but tells her to watch the oversinging. Simon says it was over the top and probably not as good as she thought it was. Randy says it was good, not great. The director apparently wants her to win because he keeps cutting to shots of her super cute kid in the audience in a blatant attempt to manipulate us.

And my DVR recording ended. They really need to work on getting this show in on time. Whatever. The rest is just recaps and some sort of BS about a surprise change to the rules they will announce tomorrow night that, in Ryan's words, "kind of change the entire theme and concept of the show."

I think Blind Scott and Jorge should probably go home based tonight's performances. Or maybe Megan. Or Alexis. Historically, I am terrible with American Idol predictions.

I'll be back here tomorrow for the elimination show, but will probably FF through the Kanye West performance.

Call for Opinions: Should I have a second baby shower?

Since we are having another girl, I can't decide if I should have second baby shower or not. My mom and my friend are pestering me to decide. We don't really need a lot of stuff. We need a few things, but nothing we can't handle on our own. Plus, I did put everything on a registry along with some stuff we don't necessarily need, but would be nice to have.

Two things I am thinking about:

1. I have so many girl clothes, that I could be having triplet girls and still not need new clothes. At my last shower, I'd say 90% of the many, many gifts I received were clothes. To even think about getting that many clothes again makes me want to cry like the ungrateful, hormonal, pregnant woman I am. If I do have shower, I would really, really like to specify that we don't need any outfits.
2. If I don't have a shower, I would like to have a "meet the baby" party instead, when she is about two months old.

So, what do you think? Should I have a shower or a party after the baby is born? I really can't decide on this one.